Bob-omb, not really one of those big fluffy one's no... kind of like this one here

Terra_Valentine, it is frustrating when people at work speak a language you don't understand, I have a few Spanish speaking colleagues and sometimes it's a bit of a shame I can't participate when they speak their language. Good luck in your relationship!


Ditto! Always here for you Valea with an ear that'll listen.

Though it is a sad story, I can only hope you will be able to overcome it and grow to be a stronger person because of it. Alcohol and alcoholism is terrible, it destroys lives... which is one of the reasons I never drink any alchohol. (And my personal encounters with alcoholism aren't as traumatic as yours by a longshot).
Equally as tragic may be how your best friend reacted... while I can't really say since I don't know all the details (don't need to know or pry about them either) it's not a sign your friend was really a good friend or person if she dropped you like a brick because she didn't reciprocate the same feelings. I'd like to think I wouldn't drop a friendship because of that.

And even I've you've had such experience, not all men are evil you know, the same is true for men who've had nothing but bad experience with women *cough*like me*cough* it doesn't mean all women are evil. I try not to generaliz even though it's easily done.
(Although in fact all people tend to do it since it is a method used by our brains to make everything more digestible, by making general categories in which it can place everything/everyone.)

well i have kept this with me for about my life and i only have told it to some people i know......

but when i heard Rosa Gigantea i cried ( i am still crying )becuase i know how hard it is.

well i geuss i to will share my story...

my real father died becuase he was run over by a truck in germany when i was about 5 years old. then my mother moved away from the city with me and my older brother to her friend she was seeing and then we lived with my new stefdad.

well i gotta say my life sucked like hell from then.
he always treating my brother like he was a saint or something. he was genius and always better then me. when he turned 13 my brother he was going to work with my stefdad and when they came back and it was dinner it happened like everyday life. o i suck. i can;t do anything and al that piece of ****. i am worthless. i always got yelled and beaten up. but i never told anyone. no one till now. but i tried to life it trough.

well then my elemtry school or how you typ it ( where you are till your 12 years old ) the teachers and other kids always picked on me.something happened yeah boele did it.
always and always me. i was the one they wanted to pick on.
when we had gym and we where done they had taken my clothes and threw them in a little dirty river on a little brigde. when i found it out the teacher's only said yeah can happen when they are young. and for 6 striaght years only bulling. only my not my class but the whole school thats was the same age and older. then some kid picked on my again when i just could'nt take it. i hit him in th eface and threw him on the ground and kicked him on the head. alot got scared but ofcourse some where not and then it got worse. then i got the blame for everything. something broke or smelled i did it.
then it was my last day and i had the last class and it was gym and some kid that was tortoring me al those 8 years i realy got sick of him and i threw to a hoke and he had a hole in his head, broke his arm and keept hitting him till the blood was everywhere.

then i got to highschool that was about to be 4 years. i went there and no one knew what i had done in my life so it was a fresh start. i made some good friends there. i could have fun with everyone but no someone was not happy with me and she was kinda pretty and she got al these 2 and 3 years older guys to pick on me but becuase i was big and strong becuase i always had fight in my hometown and in my home i could take them but in my class there was this kid that was that little bitch's slave. he was picking and picking on me and then i threw him on a table with his head and he had a big bumb and little blood. i never got the blame but the other kids. and then there was the bitch's girlfriend that was more a male. she just knew how to got on my nerves in 3 days and dhe yeah he is not gonna hit me i am girl and when he does he is fucked but like i cared right so i hit her sometimes and some of those stupid guys. i needed to leave school for one week and i though now i have done it nobody likes me anymore. even my friends but they act like nothing happend but i transferred from school because i did'nt like it there.

then i was on my new school and there i had the best day of my life. everyone liek me and i soon became the most know person on my school and my 3 years could'nt be better and the girl that caused eveything came to the same school but i never did anything back and she left the school quick. but then my life sucked again. first my stefdad died and i was happy but then in 2 years time 7 family members died but after the first 3 i never shed a tear. it was normal. i saw some get killed before my eyes and i seen fight and people get wounded but i did not care. my family is religies but i aint no more,because if he realy exist then why does the life of people sucks so bad but he my lifed sucked anyway.i am used to it. then i got stabbed but i was to bad wounded that i could'nt do anything he luahged and left. i never trusted anyone in the town where i life. and yeah after eveything my mom got down and depressed and now after 4 years she still i stressed and wotking her self litterly to dead and always yelling at me that i was the one that did everything and my btother was always mister perfect and i had fights with him and we always get wounded up but my mom never cared she onyl watched and my brother attacked me with a knife and i was bleeding and my mom. yeah just watching her soaps. so after a some days it was healed. i always wonder every day. do i die today what is going to happen today. am i getting some thing to eat today. i always got some dinner and some clothes and that was it. yeah you may be wondering and the internet and pc well my brother left them when he moved out. i talk to him sometimes but only for a minute. now my mom got a new man and he sucks. he is the same as my first stefdad.

no i am training to become strong and some of you already know what my dream is to became the strongest man in th world. and i wanna be strong to beat everyone that is trying to make me suffer again. and now i am on a campsite with a trailer together with me mom. i talk to her sometimes but he i am getting along now so. my motto in life is care only for your self and **** the rest. i have friends yeah everywhere i go. it is fun. better then my familt that his falling apart and i mean the whoel family liek granma and ****. my mom always i calling her self names and then say that i do it. she also is saying everyday when your 18 i am leaving you because then i don't get money from the goverment and **** from you. so that is when i must live on my own and the bad news is i never have been hired anywhere so. but he i will live through the end.
my motivation always was been. when i am 18 i can start over. no more family just me and let's see what happen. that was motivation to life.
yesterday my aunt died but he can happen right.


well thats a big part of my life so you know and thnx Rosa Gigantea for your story. i realy feel like there has been something lifted from my shoulders. ( o god i am still crying ).....

but i still look eveyday with joy and hope for good thing because life is how it is right

wow i dont know what to say really. I never knew that anyone her would have such tough lives.

thnx .... when i read it i just knew how harsh life could be....
and then yes.. i geuss we're crying together.
and i realy hope that the future has some good for us... i realy do



well everyone had a hard time in theyre life but some alot thougher than others... it's to bad that people like me and rosa had to get through things like this.

Wow you guys. Those are tough stories to read. Living through them must be even worse. Don't give up though! Do your best and life will get better! I was much happier when I moved out of my parents house and was in charge of my own situation. I got along much better with my family after I got away from them for a while.

@Valea- Sounds like your mom really cares enough to take you out of a bad situation. Alcoholism is a really terrible and tragic thing. I know from my own bout with it.

@boele- Keep holding on to your dream man. Don't let your mom get you down. . Right sometimes life is hard. Keep your positive attitude. I think it will help.

thanks for the nice talk. it's nice to know that there are poeple that talk nice good to other people.

and yeah i always kept my positive attitude and because of that i think i life a good life with the people i know and have fun. and my mom... wel she be gone soon and i hope that my family can get better when i am away for a while.

YES BOELE-CHAN my grandma does that to me (alot)!!!
But I still don't give up no matter how insulting she is!!! so
you better not give up or else Reon will look at you very
poorly! well I don't think I'm ready to share
my personal life yet I guess I need more time to think about
weather posting it in the forums or not ^^;

We got to know each other over the internet and last christmas we met the first time when I visited him in America. Now he came here to visit me. ^^

(just that my appartement is really small for two people @_@ I should have known... oh well as long as he doesn't touch my pc I'm fine )

Just set up a guest login for him canis. And keep yourself logged off. Last night my wife's cat got in a fight right outside our bedroom window. I went outside to deal with it (barefoot) and stepped on broken glass. Stupid cat. Oh and I got some new pants!

i have finally finished my end of year exams (yes!!!!!!!!!!!!) had an physics exam today. it was quite easy. Now i can relax and devote myslelf to looking and posting on E-shuushuu.

Had quite an eventful day today... my head's still spinning. I wasn't happy anymore at the company I've been working at for over 4 years now and wasn't really getting (or able to make) any chances there... some of you may have noticed lately that I hadn't been acting as before (in fact I think I was borderline to get a depression) because it's been getting me so down.
I was slowly starting to look at job openings and had an interview yesterday that went pretty well. They called me back today saying they were very interested, that they had a few immediate openings and made me a good offer (same pay and benefits) and a real opportunity for a change and a better environment. After some quick thinking I basically decided to take the chance, I decided to resign my current job and take this one.

With that a load fell off my shoulders that I'd finally be able to break free of this depressing situation, but I'm also a bit anxious what the new company and projects will be like (since it's a bit different and all, other hours and locations, changing every x months). - I'm not the adventurous type, hence. (Getting cold feet already, lol.)

been cleaning up all day because my nan is coming to stay with us for a week as it is sunday i cooked a roast dinner. At the moment it is rainning really heavy outside and it is very cold. It was quite hot only on friday it is like the temperature has drop like 15 degrees in 2 days. Well thats England for you.

cleaning :/ some talk with friends in NJ total and complete boredom...i think tomorrow im seeing a movie though i dont recall >.>

Congrats on your new job, Smith! ^^
Good luck with your future challenges in the new job.